The beginning of the end?

APs are finally over! Over the last few days, so much has been on my mind and I just can't find the words. I'm trying, but it's getting more and more difficult. I've started resorting to an extremely satisfying outlet, though. My poetry has always frustrated me because it never comes out quite the way I want it to, but I started writing these experimental prose/poem things based on some stuff we studied at Amherst last summer. I think the poet was Gertrude Stein. At any rate, it's so much more relieving to get words out of myself this way. I haven't been writing stories since class with Mr. Martin, but that time will come. I need a break from the slow structure of story-telling. I love it, but right now, all of the things that have been rushing around my brain need to come out in the form of these prose/poem things of which I just can't get enough. I wrote four in one sitting the other day. And I wrote one today after a revelation about the fact that Intimidating Ben at the coffee really isn't intimidating at all, and that I need to stop measuring others against myself. I was talking to Rachael about how I either want to dominate people or put them on a pedestal, and that I need to work on just looking at people as equals. Because that's what we all are. Equals. No one is better than anyone else. Another one of my resolutions for the practical application of philosophies. Here's the prose/poem I wrote today. Kalila and Macrina liked it!

"Not Cooler"

Walk in coffee purple wood wooden floor sugar sugar look, dark eyes, you think too much! headache ache intimidate dark hair, dark eyes, speak ask your questions simple simple questions loaded questions what can I get you questions arms arms chest purple too cool too cool but human human human remains look I'm here here and same remains you don't know any more than I do I do I do know do not not intimidate feel we're the same equal equal feel same love same same equal again and again know that you're not cooler and I'm just cool enough.